Why in Russia husbands forced wives with guests to kiss and other little-known facts about kisses

2024 Author: Richard Flannagan | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-15 23:55

Since ancient times, in Russia, a kiss was considered an important part of life. Weddings, funerals, meeting or parting with friends, a holiday - in all these cases, people kissed heartily. At the same time, the kiss was not a meaningless act, but had a special meaning. Read how they fought with the help of a kiss with evil spirits, what a guest kiss is, why husbands forced their wives to kiss with guests, and why a person could be kicked out of the house because of refusal to kiss.

What is a Guest Towel Kiss

The kissing ceremony in Russia, associated with the arrival of guests, was very interesting. It was conducted like this: before the dinner, which was arranged for the guests, the owner of the house called his wife. She had to go out to the guests and bow to them heartily to the ground. In response, the greeted did the same, that is, bowed. After that, it was the husband's turn to bow down. Having completed this simple action, the owner turned to the guests with a request to kiss his wife. According to the rules, they must refuse, urging the man to do it first himself. The couple kiss each other, and the husband insists on kissing again. At this point, there is no question of refusal, and the guests take turns coming up to the woman to kiss her and bow to the "small custom" (as the bow was called in Russia). The ritual ends with the fact that the wife treats everyone to wine, delivering glasses with a fragrant drink.

The guest kiss had one interesting feature: before joining her lips with the guest's, the wife applied a handkerchief or towel to her face. When all the guests were kissing, the woman was allowed to drink a glass of wine with the rest. Then she had to retire to the female half of the hut, where the wives of the male guests were waiting for her. Men feasted, but what women did is difficult to know now. Perhaps they talked, sang songs. Or maybe they were spinning or embroidering.

Kiss as protection from evil spirits and why do cows need it

During pagan times, a kiss was perceived as a way to preserve the integrity of the human body. Researchers write that in the ancient apocrypha, you can find a story about how the Devil made holes in the human body with evil intentions and the mouth, of course, also refers to them. Through an open mouth, evil spirits and ailments penetrated inside and ate a person from the inside. The voice was also considered a magical function. People were afraid to lose their voice or become hoarse, as this was a kind of bad sign, promising terrible misfortune or even death.

When people kissed, the mouth was closed, or, as they said in ancient times, it was “sealed”, therefore, evil spirits could no longer penetrate inside. The kiss was perceived as a special and very strong seal, against which devils and other spirits were powerless. That is why husbands told their wives to kiss each guest, "sealing" their mouths. Because people coming from outside could bring into the house not only good luck, joy and other pleasant things, but also a dangerous illness or misfortune.

Thus, the kiss carried magic power. Therefore, it was used with might and main in conspiracies. For example, in some areas, peasants kissed a cow on the forehead if she fell ill. So the owners tried to cure the animal. If there was a threat of mass death of livestock, then they kissed all the cows, bulls and calves.

Kisses - means, I wish you health

Some linguists believe that the word "kiss" originated from the verb "kiss". True, in Russia it sounded like "kissing". There is another opinion, according to which the word "kiss" comes from the adjective "whole". And in ancient times this word was nothing more than a synonym for the adjective “healthy”. If you think about it, even today, during some incidents, the victim is often asked: “Well, how are you? Are you safe? " If we focus on this option, then it is clear that "kissing" is not just a touch with the lips, but a wish for health. It was not in vain that people kissed those leaving for battle or hunting, because they definitely needed to stay safe, healthy and return home.

Then it becomes clear why the head of the family told his wife to kiss the guests. Strange by today's standards, the ritual meant a wish for health and happiness. And since everyone needed health, and the safety of the family depended on it, the wives meekly kissed everyone invited to the feast or just to visit.

If you don’t want to kiss the hostess, go out

In pagan times, the ancient Slavs tried to appease the gods and made sacrifices. Over time, people behaved in the same way towards guests, offering them a kiss and delicious food. Interestingly, it was indecent to refuse food. The guest had to taste all the dishes and drink all the drinks that the hosts put on the table. The guests were also “contented” by offering them the best sleeping place. It is interesting that the ceremony was performed very strictly, and the person who, for some reason, did not want to kiss the mistress, could be expelled from the house in shame.

When Christianity was adopted, the attitude towards kissing changed slightly. For example, the practice of “holy kissing” during Easter personified the unity of people, common love and happiness in connection with the Resurrection of Christ. Kissing the icon, people performed a religious ceremony, confirming their devotion to the Lord. As for friends, relatives, acquaintances and the guests already mentioned above, in this case, kisses remained a kind of expression of love, a wish for happiness.

It seems, why not just bow to the guests? Isn't that enough? Even in birch bark letters there is an answer to this question. There you can read about two types of address, namely “worship” and “kiss”. With a bow, everything is clear, it was a sign of polite treatment accepted in society. But kissing has always been, and, perhaps, will remain a cute way to express respect, love and devotion.

Both ancient customs and ancient prohibitions were strange. Especially those concerning men.