10 little-known facts about ancient Roman family life

2024 Author: Richard Flannagan | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-15 23:55

Families from the times of Ancient Rome can be compared with modern families, although there are radical differences. So, in the 21st century, strict social class rules and legalized violations of rights just look wild. But at the same time, children in ancient times loved to play no less than modern ones, and many kept pets in their homes.

1. Marriage was just an agreement

Girls got married in their early teens, and men got married in their 20s and 30s. Roman marriages were quick and easy, and most of them did not even smell of romance, it was purely an agreement. It was concluded between the families of the future spouses, who could see each other only if the wealth of the proposed spouse and his social status were acceptable. If the families agreed, then a formal engagement took place, during which a written agreement was signed and the couple kissed. Unlike modern times, the wedding was not held in a legal institution (the marriage had no legal force), but simply showed the intention of the spouses to live together.

A Roman citizen could not marry his beloved hetaira, cousin, or non-Roman woman. Divorce was also simple: the couple announced their intention to divorce in front of seven witnesses. If a divorce happened on the accusation that the wife was cheating, then she could never marry again. If the husband was found guilty of this, he was not threatened with such a sentence.

2. Feast or hunger

Social status was determined by how the family ate. The lower classes mostly ate simple food day in and day out, while the wealthy often held feasts and celebrations to demonstrate their status. While the diet of the lower classes consisted mainly of olives, cheese and wine, the upper class ate a wider variety of meat dishes, and just plain fresh produce. Very poor citizens sometimes ate only porridge. Usually all dishes were prepared by women or house slaves. There were no forks then, they ate with hands, spoons and knives.

The parties of the Roman nobility have gone down in history thanks to the decadence and lavish delicacies that they received. For hours, guests reclined on dining sofas while slaves picked up scraps around them. Interestingly, all the classes relished a sauce called garum. It was made from the blood and entrails of fish by fermentation for several months. The sauce had such a powerful stench that it was forbidden to use it within the city limits.

3. Insula and Domus

What the Romans' neighbors were like depended only on social status. Most of the Roman population lived in seven-story buildings called insulas. These houses were very vulnerable to fires, earthquakes and even floods. The upper floors were reserved for the poor, who had to pay rent daily or weekly. These families lived under constant threat of eviction in cramped rooms with no natural light or a bathroom.

The first two floors in insul were reserved for people with better income. They paid rent once a year and lived in larger rooms with windows. Wealthy Romans lived in country houses or owned so-called domas in cities. Domus was a large, cozy home that easily accommodated the owner's shop, library, rooms, kitchen, pool and garden.

4. Intimate life

There was complete inequality in the Roman bedrooms. Whereas women were required to bear sons, remain celibate and remain faithful to their husbands, and married men were allowed to cheat. It was perfectly normal to have extramarital sex with partners of both sexes, but it had to be with slaves, getters, or concubines / mistresses.

The wives could not do anything about it, since this was socially acceptable and even expected from a man. While there were undoubtedly married couples who used passion as an expression of affection for each other, it was overwhelmingly believed that women tied the knot in order to have children, rather than enjoying a wide variety of sex lives.

5. Legal infanticide

The fathers had complete control over the life of the newborn, without even asking the mother's opinion. After the birth of the child, they laid it at the feet of the father. If he raised the child, then it remained at home. Otherwise, the child was taken out into the street, where he was either picked up by passers-by or he was dying. Roman children were not recognized if they were born with some kind of disability or if a poor family could not feed the child. The thrown out "lucky ones" ended up in childless families, where they were given a new name. The rest (those who survived) ended up becoming slaves or prostitutes, or they were deliberately mutilated by beggars so that the children were given more alms.

6. Family vacation

Recreation was a big part of Roman family life. As a rule, starting at noon, the elite of society devoted their day to rest. Most of the recreational activities were public: rich and poor alike enjoyed watching gladiators gut each other, cheer on chariot races, or visit theaters. In addition, citizens spent a lot of time in public baths, which had gyms, swimming pools and health centers (and some also had intimate services).

The children had their favorite activities. The boys preferred wrestling, flying kites, or playing war games. The girls played with dolls and board games. Families also often just relaxed with each other and their pets.

7. Education

Education depended on the child's social status and gender. Formal education was the privilege of noble boys, and girls from good families were usually only taught to read and write. As a rule, mothers were responsible for teaching Latin, reading, writing and arithmetic, and this was carried out until the age of seven, when teachers were hired for boys. Wealthy families hired tutors or educated slaves for this role; otherwise, the boys were sent to private schools.

Education for male students included physical training to prepare young men for military service. Children born to slaves received virtually no formal education. There were also no public schools for disadvantaged children.

8. Initiation into adults

While the girls crossed the threshold of adulthood almost imperceptibly, there was a special ceremony to mark the boy's transition to men. Depending on the mental and physical prowess of his son, the father decided when the boy became an adult (as a rule, this happened at the age of 14-17). On this day, children's clothes were removed from the boy, after which his father put on a white citizen's tunic on him. The father then gathered a large crowd to accompany his son to the Forum.

This institution registered the name of the boy, and he officially became a Roman citizen. After that, the newly-made citizen within a year became an apprentice in the profession that his father chose for him.

9. Pets

When it comes to the attitude towards animals in ancient Rome, the first thing that comes to mind is the bloody massacres in the Colosseum. However, ordinary citizens cherished their pets. Not only dogs and cats were favorites, but also domestic snakes, rats and birds. Nightingales and green Indian parrots were in vogue as they could mimic human words. Cranes, herons, swans, quails, geese and ducks were also kept at home. Peacocks were especially popular among birds. The Romans loved their pets so much that they were immortalized in art and poetry, and even buried with their masters.

10. Women's independence

In ancient Rome, it was not easy to be a woman. Any hopes of being able to vote or build a career could be forgotten right away. The girls were doomed to live in a home, raise children and suffer from husband's debauchery. They had almost no rights in marriage. However, due to the high infant mortality rate, the state rewarded Roman women for having children. The prize was perhaps the most coveted for women: legal independence. If a free woman gave birth to three children who survived after childbirth (or four children in the case of a former slave), then she was awarded the status of an independent person.

Continuing the topic more 10 little-known facts about the Vestals - the most powerful women in ancient Rome.